Scary Season Spoof: Frankenstein by Ludworst Bemonster

IN A CREEPY OLD CASTLE
ALL COVERED WITH SPINES
LIVES TWELVE LITTLE MONSTERS
IN TWO CROOKED LINES.

IN TWO CROOKED LINES
THEY BROKE THEIR HEADS,
PULLED OUT THEIR TEETH
AND WET THEIR BEDS.

And we're off and spoofing, in "Ludworst Bemonster's" Frankenstein (Feiwel & Fiends, er, Friends, 2012), just published in time to get us in the mood for the scary season.

In a merry monster mashup of Ludwig Bemelmans' classic Madeline, Ludwig Bemonster, a.k.a. Nathan Hale, borrows the familiar rhyme scheme and verse form loosely to tell a tale of the terrible twelve, a student body made up of the usual Halloween suspects--a little vampire, werewolf, mummy--with the chief mischief-making monster, "the ugliest of all," Frankenstein. These terrifying twelve are overseen by Miss Devel (rhymes with Miss Clavel), who sleeps downstairs from the dorm on a gurney in some sort of mad scientist's lab.

It seems that little Fearsome Frankie is the attention seeker of this class (there's always one, right?), and he knows just how to twist the tail of their keeper, Miss D.:

NO ONE KNEW QUITE SO WELL
HOW TO TORMENT MISS DEVEL.

ONE BLACK AND DARK AND DISMAL NIGHT.
MISS DEVEL TURNED ON THE LIGHT,
AND WHISPERED "SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT."

Miss Devel shrieks and calls for Dr. Bones when she realizes that Frankie's noggin is nowhere to be found. Luckily, in his lab the mad doctor has a vault of spare monster parts and it's no big deal to transplant a new head onto Frankenstein's squat neck. Upon regaining consciousness, Frankie is a bit hungry, so he chomps up the nursing staff and Dr. Bones, pronouncing with a satisfied slurp that they "taste like rabbit!"

Back at creepy castle academy, the other students are agog at Frankie's new noggin--especially the two bright new screws that he's sporting in his cervical area.  In fact, they are more than impressed. They are jealous. And that night, not long after the weary Miss Devel straps herself onto her gurney for a restful coma, she senses a ominous omen in the air:

HOPING FOR NO MORE DISASTER,
MISS DEVEL RAN FAST
AND FASTER.

"OH, MONSTERS!" SHE PLEADED.
"MONSTERS, DO!
TELL ME WHAT IS TROUBLING YOU!"

ALL THE UGLY MONSTERS SAID--
NOTHING.
EACH HAD LOST HIS HEAD.

The cover sports a familiar-looking silver seal which tips off the reader to the parody within: "A CalderNOT Horror Tale Silver Medal." Author Hale makes the most of Bemelmans' catchy verse form, while his spoofy illustrations provide plenty of visual humor. Older primary schoolers will instantly spot the oft-parodied monster movie props and stereotypes in this timely takeoff. Pair this one with Michael Rex's popular Goodnight Goon: A Petrifying Parody (reviewed back in the day here) for a perfect pair of parodies designed to please and not to scare.

For a foretaste of the rib-tickling takeoff within, take in Ludworst's teasingly terrifying trailer here.

Monkeying with the Classics: Furious George Goes Bananas: A Primate Parody by Michael Rex

George was a great big ape who lived in a beautiful jungle.

One day a man in a funny hat saw George and said, "Ooh! What a big monkey. I want him."

Michael Rex, fairly famous for his parodies, Goodnight Goon: A Petrifying Parody and Runaway Mummy: A Petrifying Parody spoofing Margaret Wise Brown's classics, has done it again with a new takeoff which "apes" a famous tailless monkey's adventures--beginning with his abduction from the forest by the man with the yellow hat.

This George and his man with the funny hat are something else altogether. Wherever the original George was childlike in his innocence and curiosity and his man was well intentioned, if a bit naive about the care and feeding of wild animals, (a pipe before bedtime?) the interests of Michael Rex's man in the funny hat are purely pecuniary.

"Hello," said the man in the funny hat to the zookeeper.

"Would you like to buy my monkey?"

"Well," said the zookeeper, "he's actually an ape.

Monkeys have tails. But, yes, I will buy him."

He put George in a cage.... George was squeezed. He went bananas.

The zoo thing was not working out, and this George takes matters into his own hands, grabbing a bunch of helium balloons from a vendor, tying the zookeeper to them and sending him floating through the sky. The man in the funny hat tries again, this time trying to make a few bucks in the construction industry.

"My monkey would like a job. Would you like him to work for you?" asked the man in the funny hat.

"Sure," said the foreman. "But he ain't a monkey. He's an ape. A monkey got a tail."

In short order this George goes through a series of supposedly lucrative jobs which his greedy guardian digs up for him--first as the headliner in a Broadway show and then as astronaut. By this time Just George has definitely become Furious George.

He did not want to go into outer space. He wanted to go home to the jungle.

That rotten man in the funny hat was the one who should go into space!

And where there's a clever monkey, er, ape in the story, there's definitely a way that that can be arranged.

If Michael Rex's newest, Furious George Goes Bananas: A Primate Parody (G. P. Putnam's Sons, 2010) lacks the warm insouciance of his earlier parodies, older picture books fans will definitely chuckle as this George works his way through instantly recognizable take-offs on the adventures of the beloved monkey of the Curious George series. This one is a good alternative for kids who think they've outgrown the cute little George but will giggle as this Furious George gives his captor his comeuppance and finds his own way back to his beloved jungle--to stay.