It Could Be Worse! My School Stinks by Becky Scharnhorst

 

DEAR DIARY,

TOMORROW IS MY FIRST DAY AT MY NEW SCHOOL. MOM AND DAD TOLD ME TO TAKE DEEP BREATHS.

IT ISN'T WORKING.

His seatmate smells like a skunk! His locker mate is a croc. His teacher is a real bear. And the monkey bars are full of... MONKEYS!

The next morning he tries faking red spots all over. But his fake stick-on spots don't fool Mom.

But Wildwood Elementary is a ZOO! A beaver eats his pencils. A gorilla grooms his hair, looking for tasty bugs. Only Mr. Fuzzybottom, a mouse, is friendly. So naturally Mr. Fuzzbottom disappears under suspicious circustances.

I SUSPECT SAMMY THE SNAKE, BUT HE SAYS HE WAS STILL DIGESTING FROM LAST WEEK'S BREAKFAST.

And when our boy tries to make friends by sharing his cupcakes, Charlie the Crocodile bites his finger. But Nurse Molly gives him a bandaid and some good news:

"YOU CAN'T GET RABIES FROM A CROCODILE. I ASKED."

It's a jungle out there, in Becky Scharnhorst's latest, My School Stinks! (Philomel Books, 2021).

Our young scholar finds a way to adapt to his new school. After all, Betsy the Beaver has stopped chewing up his pencils and just sharpens them for him daily. His class job is cleaning the closet, where he finds dead bugs to trade with Sammy the Snake for all his desserts in the lunchroom.

And Mom and Dad finally believe him when they come to OPEN HOUSE!

Artwork by illustrator Julia Patton backs up the scene at Wildwood Elementary with jolly spot art that pictures the beastly goings-on, and Scharnhorst's Wildwood Elementary School tale provides an introduction to comic scary school stories like the classic The Teacher from the Black Lagoon series.